Neil, sounds like you’d like to join the get-rid-of-the-teenagers movement. We have brochures!
He is a teenager. Just not a typical one.
Hey, we accept teenagers too!
I’m not for get-rid-of-the-teenagers, just for the “get-rid-of-the-angsty-exaggerating-prepubescents”
But get-rid-of-the-teenagers has a much better acronym.
GROTT vs. GROTAEP
I mean, come on.
Okay, you win 
Get Rid Of Slimy Suck-ups.
GROSS.
(Yes, half-influenced by Calvin and Hobbes.)
I will decide when I suffered enough. I only edited my post because it was a joke that I realized too late that nobody understood.