Uwe Boll to Crank Out Another Shitfest

Jesus Tittyfucking Chist…

If the trailer alone doesn’t tell you that this film is going to blow, do the world a favor and please remove yourself from the gene pool.

I think Wikipedia has answered as to why he sucks so much:

*Boll essentially is a modern-day director. He’s able to secure the investors (mostly German, in Hollywood often derisively referred to as “stupid German money”), secure the rights for cheap, picking games with only moderate brand recognition, does all of the actual production himself, and swiftly cranks out a movie. While under normal circumstances a director’s movies could gross so little he’s eventually shut out from every operating studio, Boll is exempt because he funds them under a loophole in German tax law that is supported by contributors and actually rewards movies that perform badly, via a writeoff at the end of the year.

It has been recently reported that the loophole in German tax law has been revised. Starting January 2006, contributors to failed films will no longer be able to profit from failed films through a tax writeoff at the end of the year. This may well result in an end to Boll’s film career, as it would make it impossible for him to capitalize on films that fail at the box office, resulting in a loss of investors.*

So there is some light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe his career will be over soon.

Hopefully, because next on his to-kill list include:
-Far Cry
-Dungeon Siege

and he wants to secure the rights to direct a Fallout movie. God help us.

Thing is, it’s not like Bloodrayne was even a good game to begin with. What’s the point in directing a film based on a C-grade game?

That trailer does look pretty bad, my only question is how did he get Ben Kingsley, Michelle Rodriguez, and Micheal Madson to sign on.

Lets just be glad he didn’t snag the Halo right, but I bet he tried.

EDIT: Apparently he has just picked up the rights to Postal as well, atleast that game was horrible to begin with.


ROFL! It looks horrible, I’ll have to watch it on video regardless.

Uwe probly sent letters to hunderds of actors to the point of… “This will be the worst movie you’re ever likely to be in, but here’s a sample copy of the check, it’s 3 days of work, and I really don’t give a shit what you bring to the table other than your name.”

Good to see Wilma hasn’t got you, Neil.

I saw on Gamespot that he is going to do (or was that wants to do…pretty sure it’s the first) a Postal movie… C’mon, those games already suck, if that’s not screaming tax writeoff I don’t know what does.

Even though I’m not a fan of Cristophe Gans, and am pretty sure it will suck anyways, I’m glad Boll isn’t doing the Silent Hill movie.